Work & relationship drama.

Today wasn’t a good day. Still feeling terrible. Had coughing fits at work to the point of gagging.

Let me talk about yesterday at work. Our manager that I do not really like was supposed to be leaving and moving to another state as of Friday the 11th. They called a random staff meeting yesterday and while sitting there waiting for it to start we see all of the big wigs of the company walk in, which is WEIRD because they are never in our meetings. Then they proceed to tell us that our director is gone, and another guy high up in the account department. Not only that, but the manager is staying and kind of taking over the director’s role. It is just so shady and grimy, they even changed the locks to our director’s door. Our director was a really sweet lady. Then after the meeting, the director’s assistant was all upset and that made me feel bad. I went over to ask her a question and she was in tears and said she was trying to compose herself, so I put my hand on her back and was like yeah…this is always hard.

It sucks because the director was the one that was all gung-ho about hiring someone to help me, so now I feel pretty screwed. We also don’t feel secure with our job because they always say no more cut backs, then the next month they are firing people that have been there for years. Then today, I kept hearing my manager say my name, but she never came to me. Then I got a meeting notification for tomorrow morning with the manager, my supervisor, the director’s assistant, and a lady that is supposed to be helping me that isn’t really doing anything. This meeting should be interesting. Not sure what it is going to be about, but whatever.

Being sick, work is just miserable for me right now. Then tonight my fiance and I got into it. I was feeling miserable and it was crappy weather out. He wanted to go hang out with his friends, but I wanted him to stay with me because I was scared if he was in the weather he would get sicker and then in turn get me sicker. It caused a big fight…and now that I think about it, it is pretty ridiculous. We were throwing each other’s stuff downstairs…wowww. He called me psycho and a whack job because I did something pretty stupid with a knife. Really, I feel embarrassed to even type it all out because looking at it makes me see how ridiculous it actually is. I think this blog will help our relationship because it helps me see how stupid I am being.

I also got upset because he wanted to go hang out with someone I’ve only heard him talk about one time. It was just shady to me because we’ve been together over a year, and he doesn’t seem like a good friend if I’ve only heard of him once. I still have trust issues with Mike, and I am trying to give him the benefit of doubt, but it is so hard for me. I’ve always hard huge trust issues. He has been doing so good though, and maybe I don’t give him enough credit. I can be kind of overprotective. I am a nice person and I have had people taking advantage of me my entire life. He has a really good heart, too and I cannot stand the thought of someone trying to take advantage of him because he is so close to me. I really think some of his so-called friends only seem to come around when they want something…and it pisses me off. Not so much anymore since the beginning of our relationship, but it still bothers me.

I am ready for this week to be over. Soooo over. Saturday my fiance and I are going to start eating better and going to the gym. I will also be using my Bodybugg again. We are really going to try and lose weight together. I am also doing it with one of the best friends a girl could ever ask for. With that said, that means that tomorrow is our last day of eating unhealthy and whatever we want.

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